Gender issues are tough right now, lots of conversations, reactions and confusion. Terminology that was almost exclusive to the LGBTQ community is becoming mainstream despite push back by fearful ignorance. Times are changing.
Sexuality is again at the forefront of our culture, much like it was in the late 1960s, and some of the same things are still being fought for. I think it’s fantastic and about time we broke more walls down that we have hidden people behind. I’m a fairly intelligent open minded person with a long history of support for LGBTQ and women’s issues but I still have much to learn and more time to listen.
I also need to be an example to men that we can be open, honest and vulnerable with ourselves about sexuality and intimacy. Breaking down the archaic barriers of traditional manhood and the hunter/gatherer sexual ideals that have been passed down. Show that being macho or tough is not the makings of a real man and that sex is not a crusade of conquest to build a resume of manliness but something to be respected and treated as a connection between to people. Men need to grow up learning that they can’t take things that aren’t theirs even if they want it. Self control, self-awareness and self-love.
I’m a man, I know that, I’ve never had a question about my sex. Am I a straight man? I guess so, I’m fairly certain by now I’m not gay, but I don’t think the idea of intimately loving someone regardless of their gender, orientation or sexual identity is out of the question. I think women have always been my preference but I have found plenty of men attractive too. I am not uncomfortable with that or the idea of it.
So that being said, for me, being a “straight man” is rather opaque, it’s surface truth but also I feel sexuality and intimacy are often grey areas. Societal norms tell us who we are and then our conscience and support help us know who we are, and it’s all a complex mess. I’m of the opinion that being open and evolving, while painful and scary, is always good, so I will continue to listen, learn and grow as I also try to be an example of something good to those around me. We can be better, we should be better and we must be better.